This will help you distinguish between willful non-compliance and genuine discomfort or misunderstanding on your child’s part. Recognize and respect your child’s hypersensitivities as part of her ADHD nervous system. When something is bothering your daughter and causing her to act up, it may be unbearable for her. Learn how your child is hardwired, and adjust your discipline strategies. “They hate it,” says Aro, “because it’s so boring.” After the child has calmed down, she says, it’s important to explore the situation with the child and strategize together, coming up with better alternatives for the future. She stands a foot behind him and keeps him there. If behavioral correction is necessary, Aro’s main strategy is to have the child stand with his or her nose on a blank wall, with nothing to entertain him. The kids get lots of positive interaction with Mom and Dad through ongoing creative family projects. Author of a popular blog, “ Queen of the Distracted,” she has her hands full: six of seven kids, plus dad, have been diagnosed with ADHD. Play First, Punish Laterĭiscipline isn’t a problem in Lisa Aro’s home. ![]() If you get angry, you’re lowering the chance she will learn from the discipline moment.” Or the child may begin arguing, and things will escalate. “Often, kids with ADHD are so sensitive to the anger, they may not hear what you are saying about their misbehavior. Handelman suggests dealing with the immediate incident, but not to do so with anger. Become co-conspirators and make it a game: “Let’s pretend to be magicians who can disappear.” Then, if things start to unravel at a birthday party or a family reunion, take your child aside and say, “It’s time for us magicians to become invisible.” Then quietly leave. Pick a time when you’re both feeling good and calm, and plan an escape route if things go sour. Make Like a Magicianĭodson advises parents to plan ahead for possible meltdowns. Just as medication isn’t the single answer to treating ADHD, being positive isn’t the only avenue to disciplining your child without yelling - and without tears. While spanking has been shown to negatively impact bonding with parents, a positive approach ensures that, when it’s time to discipline your kids, they’ll be more receptive to your authority, not afraid of you. ![]() But more importantly, it means participating in activities you both enjoy to deepen the bond between you and your child. “Work hard on the positive side of discipline first,” says Kenny Handelman, Ph.D., a child and adolescent psychiatrist specializing in ADHD and the author of Attention Difference Disorder. He learns to be afraid of his parent.Īs challenging as it sometimes is to do, taking a positive approach can be more effective in teaching your child to act her best. “He can’t make use of that experience and conform his behavior next time,” says Dodson. ![]() Besides, says William Dodson, M.D., a Colorado-based psychiatrist who works with families challenged by ADHD, spanking a child sets him up for failure. Emotional hypersensitivity is a core ADHD trait, so the physical act of spanking can lead to emotional hurt. Spanking is a no-no in correcting misbehavior, and it is worse for a child with attention deficit disorder ( ADHD or ADD). When a parent reaches the end of her rope with an unruly child who raises the volume on his bad behavior, she may administer a slap to the child’s rear end.
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